Occasionally I'll share the e-mails that I send to Tom while he's in Korea. This is one of them.
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Dear Tom,
It wasn’t funny.
I know you’ll think so, but it wasn’t.
Look at it from my perspective. There I was, thrilled that the kids were finally in bed and then I saw it.
A furry creature on the carpet.
Look, I’m not proud to admit that I jumped up on the couch and acted like a total girl. But I thought it could be rabid , Tom. One never knows these days. My plan was to cover the thing with a box and.....well, I wasn’t sure what I’d do after that. I suppose I would have pounded on my neighbor’s door and asked the guy to dispose of the creature.
But here was the problem: there were no boxes around. This meant that I’d have to get off the couch and potentially be bitten by the RABID CREATURE.
I was so busy flipping out on the couch that I didn’t even notice that I had knocked over a couch pillow.
RIGHT ON THE RABID CREATURE!
I expected it to run off somewhere. But no. It didn’t move.
I got brave and peered closer. (And yes, for a second I had a fear that it was playing dead and when I was close enough it would latch onto my nose and I’d be screaming while spinning around the room while the thing held onto my nostril.)
Anyway, I realized it wasn’t alive.
Stop LAUGHING, Tom. The lightening wasn’t that great, can you blame me?
It turned out it was just the tail from Tommy’s Pillow Pet. How that came off is beyond me. You know how he gets rough. Maybe the tail offended him?
Still.
In my eyes, the thing looked like this:
As I said, it was dark.
Love,
Your Wife Who Thankfully Wasn’t Bitten By A Rabid Creature
PS. Stop laughing.
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