The Broken Plane

I'm home, I'm home!

Granted, it's cold and overcast outside in July but still. I'm home.

We had been visiting Tom's family in North Carolina for a week and yes, it was a good time but by the end of it you start to miss your own things.

We thought we'd get home with no problems.

We were wrong.

Yesterday we woke up early so we could get to the airport. We breezed through security for once and I remember thinking, "This is going to be a good day."

Ha.

We get to our gate and see that our flight has been delayed. This wouldn't be an issue had we not had a connecting flight that would take us to Denver. The guy behind the counter had to get us all new tickets so we could catch a connecting flight.

We ended up flying into Atlanta.

We found our next gate.

We boarded our next plane that would take us home.

And then we waited.

And waited.

Oh, and waited on the plane.

"Why aren't we moving?" I asked Tom.

The way we were seated was that he, Natalie, and Tommy were in a row of three and I was across from them. I had been right by the kids for the first flight.

"No clue," Tom said, shrugging. He flipped through a Sky Mall magazine.

I tried to read my book. But I was distracted. Why weren't we moving? Was something wrong with the plane? Was--

"Hi everyone, this is your Captain speaking," a voice popped up on the overhead. "We seem to be having issues with our power steering. We need to have people look at it before we head off."

Okay. Power steering. Yes. Please fix that.

We waited some more.

The captain popped on again. The power steering still wasn't working and he'd update us in ten minutes.

I leaned over to Tom. "What if we're one of those flights that sit out here with no access to food or water?" I remembered hearing horror stories about passengers stuck on a plane without anything for hours on end. What if that happened to us? Would a news crew come in and film? Ack, that couldn't happen, I looked like crap! I ran some fingers through my limp airplane-scented hair.

"It's not like that at all," Tom said, not bothering to look up from his magazine. "The air conditioning is still on and the flight attendants keep asking if we need anything."

Oh.

Luckily the kids were entertained by Spongebob on their DVD player. I flipped open my book and started to read. That's when the couple seated beside me was all, "We need to get out and use the bathroom."

No problem. I shut my book and let them pass.

And yes, they went in separate bathrooms. For a moment I thought they wanted to join the Mile High club. Or really, it would be the Sitting On The Tarmac club in our case.

When they came back the Captain popped on and said the power steering was broken and we'd all have to get off.

"Now what?" I asked Tom, who casually put his magazine away. Why wasn't he reacting? Why was he just sitting there? Didn't he want to know how we'd get home?

"Dunno," Tom said, shrugging.

We grabbed our stuff and got off the plane. Then we were told to go to another gate where another plane would be waiting.

Yay! Home!

Of course they kept pushing back the time when we would leave. First they said 630, then 645, then 725...

And then finally we were on the plane.

"While we were waiting I caught the news and apparently we'll be flying through some pretty bad storms," Tom said simply.

Um.

Why would he tell me, a person terrified of flying, that? He barely said a thing when we had to change planes and the thing he decides to say is about BAD WEATHER?

Our flight was bumpy. When the Captain came on to warn us that it would be "pretty bumpy and that we should all put our seat belts on" I tensed. The plane shook pretty violently, just like it did before it split apart in Lost.

"If we crash on an island, you'll have to be like Jack," I hissed to Tom. I scanned the other passengers and there didn't seem to be another competent male on board. The guy who was seated in my row kept jumping up to go pee and I had to keep getting up to let him pass. How could we be saved by someone who has to pee every half hour?

"Natalie could be like Kate, because she's fiesty, and Tommy could be like Aaron because of his blond hair. I guess I'd be Claire then," I rambled.

Tom blinked at me. "You're strange."

"I'm strange? You'll thank me when we crash and have a plan," I said as the plane jolted. My stomach leaped up to my throat as I gripped the arm rests. I couldn't die this way. Not on a plane with a couple who had bladders the size of a pea.

"Do you want the barf bag?" Tommy asked, dangling it towards me.

"No thanks," I said, a little embarrassed to know that I was freaking out and my own children were not. Tommy was staring out the window in awe shouting things like, "Wow, we're going through a HUGE cloud!" and Natalie was playing with her creepy Yo Gabba Gabba toys. Tom was just sitting there as though he were watching one of his World War 2 shows.

The plane took another dive.

I sucked in my breath.

I shut my eyes and started to think of chocolate and the fact that Big Brother starts on Thursday! Who would be the house witch? Who would be the mousy houseguest who would inevitably win it all?

I must've fallen asleep because the next thing I knew the Captain was coming on saying that we should be in Denver in twenty minutes.

"You okay, Sleeping Beauty?" Tom joked.

"We're alive," I said. "We're alive."

"Um. Yes," Tom said slowly, as though he were speaking to a mental patient.

When we landed I was relieved. We had made it! Yes!

Of course we still had an hour and a half drive to Wyoming. Ugh. Tom and I were both tired so I kept us awake by asking Tom all sorts of World War 2 questions. ("What was wrong with Hitler, what was up with that mustache? Did he actually think it looked good? What was your favorite battle?")

And then we were home.

Ten minutes later we were in bed, vowing to take care of unpacking tomorrow.

And now I'm on here, vowing to take care of the unpacking by the end of the day.

Though Tom said, "Since we'll be visiting your family in a few weeks, how about we just leave the stuff in the suitcase?"

I looked at him and went, "No, the kids have different clothes. Since we'll be at the beach, they have beach themed outfits you know."

Tom rolled his eyes. "I should have known."