Wednesday, February 6, 2013

These Are The Days Of Kindergarten Lives

I could tell she had a rough day from the way she flopped on the couch. Normally she bursts through the house, says hello to her toys, and shows me what she did at school.

“What’s wrong?” I pressed. I sat down next to her and noticed glitter near her left eye. There’s always glitter on some part of her body thanks to her glittery dress/shoes/shirts…she also likes to play with actual glitter, much to my chagrin. I once found her flinging it in the air and dancing in it as it came down.

“It’s raining pixie dust!” she had informed me gleefully. She looked so happy that I didn’t even chastise her.

Now she wasn’t happy. Her lower lip was puffed out and she buried her face into the couch pillow.

“Fklsdfjklj,” she muttered, her voice muffled by the fabric.

“What?”

She sniffled and looked up. “He broke my heart!” Then her face disappeared into the pillow again. Her tiny body started to shake and I sat there, baffled.

Broke her heart?

She was FIVE!

A baby!

She still wore cartoon underpants and believed that glitter was pixie dust!

Who was HE?

“Who broke your heart?” I asked. How was I already dealing with this? Teenage years I could comprehend. But Kindergarten?

“Matthew,” she whispered, coming up for air.

It’s a boy she loves playing with at school. She’ll randomly say at home, “I wonder if Matthew will think I look pretty in this?” or, “I wonder if Matthew thinks I look pretty with my hair long?” In the morning when I drop her off at school, if she spots Matthew, she’ll flutter her eyelashes at him and wave her fingertips in his direction. He’ll always give her a wide grin and shout, “Hi Natalie!” Sometimes he chases her. She’ll shriek and run away with a wide smile on her face.

And now he broke her heart.

“How did he break your heart?” I wanted to know.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes. “He….wouldn’t chase me today. He IGNORED me!” She looked mortified.

“Boys can be fickle creatures,” I explained. “Especially if they lose a game.” I made a face as I thought of Tom yelling at the computer if someone dared to blow up his tank.

“He doesn’t like me anymore,” she said.

“I’m sure that’s not true,” I promised.

I managed to cheer her up by making a face out of apples and raisins. She might be a dramatic child, but small things like a face from food still amuse her.

The next day after school she seemed happier.

“Matthew and I are back together!” she announced and I nearly fell over. “He broke my heart but he didn’t today!”

“Back together?” I repeated as though it were a dirty word. “You’re only 5! I still wipe your butt after you poop!”

Natalie gave me a Look.

“We’re FRIENDS!” she said as though I were a complete idiot.

Okay. Friends who got back together. Cool.

She and Matthew seem to be okay again. She hasn’t come home all sad and broken hearted.

But guys? I’m scared. If she’s this dramatic about boys at the age of FIVE…imagine how she’ll behave at FIFTEEN.

Help me.

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