No Regrets

When my mom died my friend Mary was sent to Wal-mart to get some panties and a bra for my mom.  Granny panties I told her....yet, my friend has an impish side to her that I love very much and she also bought a red thong and bra....the joke though was on her....not me.  I was never given the bag with the thong in it....the funeral home took the bag and went to work getting my mom ready.....all during the viewing....people would come up and ask me....if my mom was wearing the red thong....you know...in times like these you have to have some brevity....and Mary gave me just that.  Did she really buy a red thong and panties....who knows....it is not important.  It was just a light moment in a dark time.  Yesterday Mary sent me an email with a comment attached..."I knew I should have done the red bra and panties."  I did not understand the comment until I read the post.  "A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package: 'This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.' He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box. 'She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said: 'Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion'. I still think those words changed my life. Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day...I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it. I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. T he words 'Someday....' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now....I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell...I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come. Each day, each hour, each minute, is special. Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.."  Yesterday I attended a most unusual send off.  My friend Renee's father died late Wednesday afternoon.  He was such a sweet and humble man...and he did not want a big fuss over him....he wanted to be cremated and so before he was taken for that....those of us who loved him and loved his family met in a room at the funeral home and said goodbye.  There were no flowers....there was no coffin....there was just Mr. Glen....with his suspenders on....sleeping peacefully.  Renee, Dexter, and Carissa went first....she spoke to him as if he was going to wake up any moment....then kissed him sweetly and the little family hugged.  It was a touching sight.  The rest of us said our goodbyes and Frank offered up the sweetest prayer.  Having just been through this same scenario with my dad I want Renee to know that she was blessed to have spent the last four years being with her dad.  He lived in a trailer in her back yard.  She got to spend time with him....something that if he still lived away would not have happened.  There was no someday for the two of them....there was everyday.  I was blessed with that same time and believe me it has made a world of difference.  Mr. Glenn will be sorely missed by those of us at his church, his friends, and most of all this sweet little family....but this man left a wonderful legacy.  He was very special.  I know that he entered the gates of heaven and they welcomed him with open arms.