Saturday, June 12, 2010

Will the Real Wilma Please Stand Up?

Last week Frank and I went to visit my mom at the Adams Dementia Unit.  When we entered the doors and walked down her hall there she was coming towards us with her arms open...waiting for hugs.  It was such a touching sight.  I immediately went into her arms, the ones that comforted me when I was a child and felt safe for a moment.  Then she hugged Frank, grabbed both of our hands, and we moved into the sunroom to visit.  I was glad to see that she was not in bed today.  Many times, because of the Sundowners, when I go to visit my mom during the day she is in the bed asleep....so our visits are nothing more than me holding her hand while she sleeps and kissing her forhead when I leave.  We were having a great visit in the sunroom....or so I thought.  After about 15 minutes(length of her attention span these days)...Mom excused herself to go to her room.  I figured she was going to the bathroom.  She was gone a few minutes and returned to our table.  Five more minutes passed and she excused herself to walk down the hallway.  She said her legs needed to stretch.  I smiled and looked at Frank...he was getting a bit antsy so I knew our visit would be over soon.  She returned from her walk....but she did not come back to our table....nope...she went to the other side of the sunroom and sat down in the chair she had vacated when we arrived.  I watched her stare down the hall, watching the doors to see who was going to come through them.  We sat like that for about five or so minutes when she finally looked to the other side of the sunroom and noticed us sitting there.  Her face lit up and she returned to the table.  Five minutes passed and I knew our visiting time was over.  She was off in her world and it was as if we were not there.  We hugged and kissed her and left.  That same week I had gone to see her during my planning period.  We were having a lovely visit in the sunroom....and she excused herself....this time she did not return and I got a little worried....so I went to her room to check on her.  There she was....sitting on the side of her bed, taking off her shoes, readying herself to take a nap.  I told the nurse I was leaving....and left.  My cell phone rang at 8p.m. and it was my mom....wondering why I had not visited her today.  Somedays I can't win for losing....somedays I cry when I see her....most days, I have to laugh at her antics and remember that the woman who is housed in that body....is not my mom.  Will the real Wilma please stand up?  God bless you all today.  Stay safe over the weekend.  If you have one, hug your momma...or at least call her and tell her you love her.  Ciao!

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