The Power of a Pencil

My sweet Frank outdid himself today with his sermon.  I tell him often that whatever sermon he just preached I believe was his best...but today he broke all records.  Todays was truly the best ever....it was simple and to the point.  The message was on the Power of the Pencil.  I love to hear him preach.  I don't think I will ever tire of it.  I guess it is a good thing I am a preacher's wife huh? The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box. There are 5 things you need to know, he told the pencil, before I send you out into the world. Always remember them and never forget, and you will become the best pencil you can be.
1 ... You will be able to do many great things, but only if you allow yourself to be held in someone’s hand.
Just like a pencil, in the hand of the right person, can do some amazing things, you can do amazing things if you allow yourself to be held in God’s hand.  A pencil can make beautiful drawings in the hand of an artist.  A pencil can craft amazing stories in the hand of a writer.
A pencil can solve the most complex algebraic equations in the hand of a mathematician.  A pencil can sketch the most perfect blueprint in the hand of an architect.  A pencil can write the most touching note in the hands of a loved one. But in the wrong hands, a pencil can become useless or worse, used for the wrong things.
In the hand of a two-year old, a pencil becomes a dangerous toy. The child stares at the pencil adoringly before placing it in his mouth where it can do a lot of harm. In the hand of an enraged fiancé, a pencil becomes a dangerous weapon.  Have you ever been stabbed by one...let me tell you...it hurts!....and if lead breaks off in the wound...you can get lead poisoning...which is deadly.
2 ... You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, but you’ll need it to become a better pencil.
Just like a pencil has to be sharpened to become better, you can be sharpened by going through various problems and trials, but it will indeed make you a stronger person.
3 ... You will be able to correct mistakes you will make.
Just like a pencil has an eraser to be able to correct mistakes, you, through the grace of God, can correct mistakes and grow through them.
4 ... The most important part of you will always be what’s inside.
Just like a pencil’s most important part is the lead that’s inside, it’s what’s on the inside of you that’s important. The part of you that makes you who you are is what’s on the inside. It’s not about what’s on the outside. It’s not about the clothes you wear, or how you style your hair. It’s not about your weight or your height. It’s not about your face or your teeth. It’s not about your eyes or your nose. It’s not about how much money you have. It’s not about how popular you are. It’s about what’s on the inside....that is where your heart is...and your heart is who you really are.
5 ... On every surface you are used on, you must leave your mark. No matter what the condition, you must continue to write.
Just like a pencil’s purpose is to leave its mark, you are to leave your mark wherever you go. No matter what the situation, you must continue to serve God in everything. No matter where you go, you can make a difference. You can leave behind a legacy. You can influence people and do it by just being yourself. You don’t have to fit into the in crowd. You don’t have to give in to the peer pressure. You don’t have to follow everyone else.
The pencil understood and promised to remember, and went into the box with purpose in its heart. Now, my question for you on this glorious Sunday morning is do you understand?  I know after today...that everytime I look at a pencil...I will remember the power it carries and know that I too have the ability to carry that same power.  Happy Sunday to you all...may yours be blessed.

Happy Caturday With a Twist

My students are all the time showing me something they think is of value from You Tube.  I love some of the stuff.  I have watched cats look like they are talking, groups sing, I first saw the Idol singing sensation from the UK on You Tube...because I don't watch American Idol.  I love it.  This week my intern shared one with me called Cat-Man-Do...it is about Simons Cat and I laughed until I hurt.  This has got to be the funniest thing ever....so since my good friend Jeannie always does a Happy Caturday I thought I would follow her lead today and do a Happy Caturday With a Twist.  If you want to see some absolutely priceless cats with quotes then you need to check her out....but...if not....I hope you enjoy the video I chose for you.  It is the Cat-Man-Do one I saw first.  I personally think it is the best...the Fly would have to be my second choice.  Have a great weekend!

Chuck E Cheese Virgin

I’m a Chuck E Cheese virgin.

At least I was until we finally went this past weekend.

I had no idea what to expect. I mean, I guess I sort of did because of the commercials. Some cartoon rat would bounce around the screen in front of games that lit up and a cacophony of children would sing, “Chuck E Cheese’s! Where a kid can be a kid!”

Tommy had been begging me to take him.

So we finally relented and said we’d go. He was ecstatic. Even Tom seemed to be a little excited. He had gone several times as a kid and bragged about how good he was at certain games.

When we first walked into Chuck E Cheese I was confused as to why this woman was stamping our hands with numbers.

“Why is she branding us?” I hissed to Tom.

“Our number matches our kids. That way someone can’t walk off with them. Because you just let your kids run and play in here,” Tom explained knowingly.

Um. Unattended children? That didn’t seem safe. But wait. The stamp number thing. I guess it made sense.

“Does that mean that random kids will be bugging us?” I wondered. And to prove my point, the second my hand was stamped a little boy ran up, stuck his tongue out, and scurried away.

“An unattended child just made a face at me!” I said to Tom indignantly. “Children should not be left unattended even with numbers. Kidnappers could probably manage to take a kid. They could—oh my God, Tom. What is that?” With a shaky finger, I pointed to a giant Chuck E. Cheese walking around. I do not like giant characters when you can’t see the face of the human that inhabits them. It’s probably why Yo Gabba Gabba terrifies me so much. “What kind of place is this?” I demanded.

Tom sighed beside me. “It’s just Chuck E. He won’t hurt you, I swear.”

But you never know what’s going on underneath the costume. That’s why I don’t like it when I can’t see the face. They could be LEERING at you or something.

“I don’t want to go near it,” I said, huddling up beside Tom. Another unattended child raced past.

“Look, we won’t go near it.” Tom rolled his eyes. “I’ll get a table, you get the pizza.”

I kept my eye on the giant rat. He was across the room, thank goodness. “Okay,” I said, and joined the line for our food. I had a coupon that I printed out and thank goodness I did because we would have paid nearly $15 more for a pizza and drinks. Plus my coupon included 40 tokens. I wasn’t sure what they were when the lady pushed the cup towards me.

“Gold?” I frowned.

“First time?” she asked. Her expression was all, “Holy crap, lady.”

I nodded.

“Those are the tokens to play the games,” she offered politely.

“Oh. Thanks.” I grabbed the tokens along with the plates and number for our pizza. Several unattended children nearly collided into me. I wanted to yell, “Where are your parents?” But then I remembered. It’s Chuck E Cheese. Kids aren’t attended here. I surveyed the room and found parents sitting at booths having adult conversations. Oh, how nice. I was beginning to understand this place. Too bad Natalie was too young to be left alone.

“Now what?” I asked Tom, dropping off the stuff.

“We play!” Tom grinned. He grabbed some tokens. “Come on, Tommy.” They started to walk off.

“Excuse me!” I called out. “What do I do?” I gestured to Natalie, who kept trying to walk away towards the blinking lights of some car game.

“Whatever you want,” Tom said unhelpfully.

Okay. I took Natalie’s hand. “What do you want to do?”

“Horsie!” Natalie said, pointing to a giant horse that looked as though it had seen better days.

But okay. Horsie it was. We got in line. It was our turn but then an unattended child cut in front of us and climbed up on the horse.

“Um,” I said. “It’s our turn.”

The kid looked to be around six, so he knew better.

“Sorry,” he said but didn’t sound it at all. And he didn’t remove his ass from the horse. I was about to remove him myself but then the GIANT CHUCK E CHEESE came up behind me.

“EEEEE!” I went, shielding myself with Natalie.

Giant Chuck E seemed amused. Or really, how would I know because I COULDN’T SEE HIS FACE. For all I knew, a chick could be under there.

Natalie liked him. “Hi!” she said and even gave the creature a hug. *Shudders*

Then Giant Chuck E held out his hand. What did he want from me? Was he trying to swipe my purse? Was he coming on to me? WHAT DID HE WANT?

Oh.

A high five.

Natalie happily gave him one. Then Giant Chuck E stuck his hand out towards my face. What, he expected ME to touch him? I gave him a half hearted high five and prayed that he’d go away.

He did. A group of unattended children surrounded him, saving me.

“I go der!” Natalie said, pointing to some plastic tunnels attached to the ceiling. It looked dangerous but what do I know? She easily climbed up and I watched as she crawled through the tunnels.

Then she refused to come down.

Tom and Tommy joined me. “Where’s Natalie?” Tom asked.

I pointed up. “She won’t come down.” I was beginning to panic. What if she refused? Would I have to climb up there? What if I got STUCK and the fire department was called to get me UNSTUCK? Oh, the humiliation. I knew I shouldn’t have eaten all those Ding Dongs.

“Mommy? I scared!” Natalie called out.

“Then go down the slide. Do you see the slide? GO DOWN THE SLIDE!” I yelled dramatically.

Tom gave me a Look. “Calm down.”

But I couldn’t down. My child was SCARED and I was just STANDING THERE.

“Mommy will come get you if you need help. Did you hear me? MOMMY WILL COME GET YOU!”

A few other parents stared at me as though I had a neon pink bra wrapped around my head.

And then the giant rat started coming closer again.

“Tell it to go,” I said to Tom as I struggled to find Natalie in the colorful tubes.

“Um, you can’t tell it to go. This is technically his place,” Tom reminded me.

“I don’t care, I want it to go, it freaks me out. NATALIE! Can you hear Mommy? Can you—” Then I realized Natalie was climbing back down. Phew. She hurried over, I scooped her up and got as far away from the rat as I could.

Our pizza arrived soon after that. It was pretty good. Though in the middle of eating, an unattended kid came and stared at us with his mouth wide open for a few minutes.

I was about to tell it to shoo but he abruptly turned and went to gape at another family.

“This place is strange, Tom,” I said, sipping some Diet Coke.

“Nah. It’s great. Look.” Tom dug in his pocket and produced a long trail of tickets.

“How did you win that?” I was impressed. It looked like a lot of tickets and at Chuck E Cheese I knew the tickets helped the kids win a prize.

“Oh. I have skills.” Tom blew off his fingers like he had just accomplished a major feat.

After we ate it was time for more games. Or in my case, avoiding the giant rat. Why wouldn’t he leave? Didn’t he get a break? Then as Natalie hopped on another ride, a bunch of giant puppets started to sing on a stage.

“What the hell?” I said, shrinking away. It looked like there was a giant chicken up there strumming on a guitar. What was it doing? Why was it singing?

“What’s wrong?” Tom asked, coming up beside me.

I jumped. “A giant chicken is SINGING!”

Tom chuckled. “That’s what happens. Like every half hour. For the children’s amusement,” he added. I think he believed that I thought they were singing to terrify me.

A frightening place indeed.

We finally used all our tokens. I rocked at Skee Ball. I won a total of five tickets. But still. I was impressed. This kid totally tried to take one of my balls and I was all, “HEY! MINE!” I think I scared him. But unattended children need to learn some manners.

In the end we had 97 tickets and the Chuck E Cheese worker kindly let me round it up to 100. So Tommy picked out a foam rocket and all Natalie wanted was a Chuck E Cheese balloon.

“Are you sure?” I didn’t really want that smiling rat in my home.

“BALLOON!” Natalie insisted. She stomped her foot down for emphasis.

So fine. We got her a balloon.

Before we left the numbers that had been stamped on our hand were checked. I almost forgot this and when the woman tried to take a peek at my hand I thought she was coming onto me and was about to swear off Chuck E Cheese forever. I mean first the giant rat, then the unattended children and now some stranger was pushing back the cuff of my sleeve?!

Then I realized what she was doing.

And then we went home with Tommy gripping his prized foam rocket, Natalie with her balloon, Tom feeling a high because he had performed well in games, and myself, who was slightly worried that the giant rat was going to follow us home.

He didn’t, thank goodness.

Well. In a way he did because look:



Help.

My Friday's Fave 5

I was reading posts this morning and my dear friend Mary was doing a great neme called Fave 5.  I love Friday so I thought I would check it out and decided to play too.  The original post came from Living to Tell the Story.  It is a great blog so you need to check it out.  Thanks Mary for introducing me to it.  So just what are my five favorite things for today? 

1.  The fact that it is Friday.(and unofficially senior skip day).  When you are this close to the end of the year, senioritis has set in on the students, believe me teachers take cheer in whatever they can. 
2.  Did I mention the fact that it is Friday?  Oh yes, that was number one.  Number two would have to be this wonderful weather.  The only thing wrong with it is that I have been cooped up inside...and the nice weather is outside...and tomorrow...when I am off...it is going to rain!  Still...I have enjoyed sitting on my porch this week after work...and just chilling and soaking in the warmth.
3.  Good friends - My birthday was on the 15th and I have gotten presents all week.  It has been better than Christmas.  Trina gave me a neat wind chime that is made out of wine bottles, I got a gift certificate from Silver to a neat Indian restaurant, I got a beatiful picture (spells out Korb) from my daughter (and it is going to be a blog post next week), I got a lovely silver bracelet from my friend Mary, a spa day from Amanda...I get to go to the Main Event...whooo hooo...., sun catchers from Kayla and Patsy....butterflies...a bracelet/scarf from Maelynn, wind chimes from Deb and Laurie...a Vera Bradley clutch from Cindy and Rita, a cross from Rhonda...and my favorite quote picture from Rita R.  Good friends Rock!
4.  Setting up the altar at the Arbor.  I love to design and set up the altar for the Arbor service.  It is so peaceful and most of the time I don't even cut the overhead lights on.  I just stand there with a little light streaming out from the closet area....it is my time with God.
5.  The azaleas in bloom.  Nothing is prettier....unless it is the hydrangeas when it is their turn.  That is the one thing I am going to miss about this house when we move.  The azaleas are fabulous here.  I am so glad all the flowers in the world don't bloom at the same time.  Life would be so bland.  Happy Friday!

Granddaddy's Guitar

Granddaddy's Guitar

Round back bent and broken

From years of nightly use.

Inlays missing, dusty,

rusty from  neglect and abuse.

Strings that are still and silent,

out of tune, played no more.

Once a master stroked you,

coerced the sound to soar.

The songs that lie encased,

inside your wooden heart,

These songs were my beginning,

where I got my start.

My grandfather once held you,

just like he once held me.

And when he touched our heart string,

set both our sprits free.

When I hold you now I know,

that I am free to know,

where eagles fly, where mill wheels turn,

where'er I want to go.

Thank you grandpa for this gift,

your favorite guitar.

I'll use it-while I'm here,

and then pass it on again!

Stillmagnolias, the group I sing with wrote a song about my grandfather.  If you would like to hear our music then check out our MySpace page StillMagnoliaslive and hear my group sing.  You might want to check out Flight 307 too.  My ex-husband has given us a plethera of ideas for music.  Happy Thursday!

Redbook to the Rescue?

It was not a good day.

I told Tom this when he woke up. He works the night shift so he sleeps until the afternoon. He seemed a little taken aback when he came down the stairs and saw me sitting in the middle of the living room with a bunch of Natalie’s toys surrounding me. Not to mention a spray of crumbs.

“Would you believe,” I said to Tom in a shaky voice, “that I had this room cleaned ten minutes ago? But just look. Look what you daughter did to it.”

Tom blinked. He wasn’t sure how to respond so he just scratched the side of his head and went, “Er.”

Very insightful man, that Tom.

“This has not been a good day,” I continued, standing up. I brushed crumbs off my knees. Natalie had been munching on some crackers and had decided to turn them into confetti. She had crumbled them into her palms and had tossed the bits into the air. “Weeee!” she had gone. “Weeee!” I had been in the kitchen doing the dishes and hadn’t known what she was doing.

“Why hasn’t it been a good day?” Tom asked, but his tone indicated that he really wasn’t interested. He probably just wanted to sit in front of the computer but he knew if he did that then I’d probably lash out and call him names. He says that I have rage issues and that I can be mean. This isn’t true. I mean, okay, maybe it’s a little true. I did call him numbnuts the other day but that was because he was just STANDING there as I was cleaning up. Who just STANDS there and watches another person clean? I mean honestly. I did apologize for the name calling, by the way.

“No one will listen to me,” I began. “This morning as I got Tommy off to school, he kept shouting even though I explained that Mommy wasn’t a morning person and that if he valued keeping his tongue, that he ought to keep it down. Then Natalie was up and she didn’t want to listen and kept bringing out every single toy she owns to the living room. I tried to get a tiny break in and read a few pages of my book but then she wanted to play tea. I said I didn’t want to play tea but she insisted, slapped her tea hat on me and forced a plastic cup in my hand. After tea time I went upstairs to clean and realized that your son had PISSED in the plastic tote that holds his cars. Who does that? Is he some kind of animal?”

Tom made a face. “Er,” he offered.

“Then your daughter won’t stop shitting. I cleaned three shits today and I think it’s because she ate an entire tray of veggies yesterday. Then I had to do the catbox and let me tell you Tom, I’m so tired of dealing with other people’s bowel movements. I’m just so tired and I just want to sit and BE for a bit but I can’t because I live with a bunch of animals!” I concluded.

“Go upstairs and rest then,” Tom suggested. Thank goodness he actually said something. If he had gone “er” I might have called him numbnuts again.

I did go upstairs. I started to go through my pile of papers that I’ve been meaning to sort through. I stumbled upon several magazine articles that I had torn out—if an article interests me, I tear it out so I can re-read it.

I found one that made me smile.



It was from Redbook and it was about 5 ways to de-stress in 20 minutes or less.

Sweet!

I definitely needed to de-stress. So I surveyed the article and decided to do the different ideas that it suggested.

Number one was to tidy up a little.

Um.

I had been tidying up all day. Didn’t the article realize I had been dealing with people’s excrements? According to the article, stress-reducing endorphins sometimes get released while cleaning.

This doesn’t happen o me.

Stress-CAUSING endorphins get released when I clean. Because I start to think, “Why am I picking up a GROWN MAN’S socks? Why is there PISS in this plastic bin? How many turds is this child going to produce?”

So yeah. I moved onto the next suggestion.

That one said that I ought to stare out the window because nature scenes can help a person de-stress.

Okay. I could give it a try.

I gazed out the window.

La-la-la, waiting for the de-stress to wash over me.

A few cars drove by. Boring.

Then I noticed my neighbor in her yard planting something. She was staring up at me in confusion.

Great. My neighbor probably thought that I was either A) spying on her or B) checking her out.

“It’s okay,” I wanted to say, waving the article around. “I’m just trying to de-stress!”

Ugh.

So that bombed.

I checked the article again. Number three said I should sniff some coffee. Problem? We don’t drink coffee in this house. Maybe I could run to Starbucks? The article said that the smell of coffee beans helped relax sleep-deprived rats after all.

Wait a minute.

RATS?

Was the article comparing me to a RAT?

Moving on to suggestion number four.

Ohhh. It was telling me to get my game on. Apparently games are distracting from your problems. Well, duh. The thing is, I don’t play a lot of computer games. Not anymore. I used to play a game called EverQuest before I had kids but now I don’t have time for it. I do play the Wii but usually when the kids are in bed because if I try to do it when Natalie is up, she stands directly in my way and tries to take the Wii-mote from me. Then I get irritated and she cries and shouts that I’m not SHARING and I wind up turning the game off.

I checked out the last suggestion.

Score a yoga buzz just by breathing.

You mean all I had to do was BREATHE to relax?

I decided to try it out. I was told that I should sit quietly and close my eyes. Then I needed to let my muscles completely relax and release tension. I had to shrug my shoulders, and roll my head and neck. I did this and felt like I was Linda Blair. I breathed in and out, in and out. Ooo, maybe it was working. I did feel relaxed. I did—

“Where are the diapers? Natalie took a dump!” Tom’s voice rudely cut into my thoughts.

I kept my eyes closed. “You know where they are,” I yelled back. Why doesn’t he check first? Does he think I wake up and go, “I think I’ll change where I store the diapers.”

“It really SMELLS!” Tom boomed.

“Welcome to my world!” I answered.

Silence.

Ahh, I could relax again.

I was drifting away into another world, one filled with cosmopolitans, lifetime chocolate supplies and an explanation of what in the world is going on with Lost. I was—

“What are you doing?” The bedroom door was thrown open and Tom stood there with Natalie beside him.

“De-stressing,” I said. My eyes were still shut.

“You look like you’re about to fall asleep sitting up,” Tom the genius observed.

“I’m not. I’m trying to—oofff!” The ooof was because Natalie hurled her body into me and I fell back. My eyes snapped open and Natalie’s face was inches from mine.

“Horsie!” she said and sat on my face. Ugh. Thank goodness Tom had changed her diaper. Otherwise I’d have probably passed out.

“Get off Mommy,” Tom said, lifting her off. He stared down at me. “Are you better now?” That was his way of saying, “Are you going to be nice and not call me names?”

I sighed and stood up. “I guess.”

“I know a way to cheer you up,” Tom said and I thought he was going to suggest something sexual. But no, he said that he’d take me out for some ice cream.

“Remember Dairy Queen has that deal where you can buy a blizzard and get another one for twenty five cents,” Tom added, knowing it would make me happy that we’d save some money in the process.

So in the end, the article didn’t really help me de-stress.

It was my delicious Butterfinger blizzard that did.

In Which I Stink At Bowling

We went bowling over the weekend.



It looks like someone needs to teach Tommy about good sportsmanship.

He was ticked because he didn’t get a strike like Tom did. I said, “Kid, look, you knocked all but one pin down. That’s good!”

He was all, “It’s not good enough,” and pouted in his chair.

Gee, I wonder where he gets that behavior from?

(TOM!)

Have I mentioned that Tom owns his own bowling ball and shoes? Well, he does. He used to be really into bowling. I find it amusing that he even has a special cloth to wipe down his ball after each use. He also has these shoe cover things to cover the bottom of his shoes.

I mocked him for that, too.

He was all, “What, the covers are so gross stuff don’t get on the bottom of them. Stuff can throw my balance off and I won’t be able to throw the ball well.”

Um. Okay. Psycho.

Kidding, kidding.

I use the bowling alley shoes and the bowling alley balls. I found a pretty pink one and thought that she and I would make a good team.

We didn’t.

Make a good team, that is.

Because during my first two turns I got NOTHING. My ball kept rolling in the gutter.

“Do I need to put the bumpers up for you?” Smart Ass Tom called out.

I’d have given him the finger if the children hadn’t been around.

Natalie seemed to like bowling.





It was her first time so she didn’t really get the concept at first. When she rolled the ball down she was all, “Where da ball going?”



She soon got into the game and started to do a happy dance after each turn.

And Tom?

Well, he takes his game seriously. He’d march up there all determined and put on his special bowling gloves.

Yes. He also has bowling gloves.



Then he’d do this fancy move and hurl the ball down the lane.

When he’d finish with his turn he’d polish his ball down and put on his shoe covers. This is why there aren’t any photos of me. I asked him to take a photo of me but he was too busy messing with his ball (ha!) or his shoes.

Towards the end I debated hiding his shoe covers to see if he’d flip out.

I didn’t though.

Because I fear he would have flipped out. Heaven forbid something gets on the bottom of his bowling shoes.

In the end, we all had fun. Tommy did have a small meltdown because he didn’t understand why I got to have an extra turn. See, I got a spare on my last frame which meant I got to go again. I always forget this so I sat back down and Tom was all, “Go!” and I was all, “WTF, it’s not my turn, Tom. Duh.” And then he explained the rules to me.

Oops.

So yeah, Tommy was all, “Why do you get to go again, that’s not fair,” and had an Asperger flare up. I calmly explained what happened and he took a few deep breaths and was able to calm himself down.

Until Natalie got a strike and got to go again.

Then he was all, “SHE gets to go again too?” So I was praying that he’d get a spare and get to go again.

He didn’t.

So of course he pouted all over again so I had Tom explain the rules and Tom did and added, “Toughen up, okay?” Naturally this made me irritated with Tom because I had to re-explain Aspergers to him. I feel like I have to explain Tommy’s behavior on a weekly basis to Tom. He just doesn’t get it.

Other than that, it was an enjoyable evening.



I sucked, as you can tell (I'm A):



Tom’s score is covered but he got a 114. He was all, “That’s not good enough.”

Dude. I’d be thrilled with anything over 100.

But I guess he’s used to scores near the 200s or something.

Well, la-di-dah, Tom.