Easter Bunny 101

“I have a question,” Tommy said seriously the day before Easter.

“What is it?” I answered. I hoped it wasn’t another question about c-sections. Tommy is currently obsessed with pregnancy. He tends to fixate on certain subjects and then he’ll move on to another.

“Is the Easter Bunny an actual bunny or a man dressed up like a bunny?”

Crap.

How do I answer that?

Someone really needs to write How To Explain The Easter Bunny To Your Kids So You Don’t Damage Them. Or perhaps there ought to be a college class. Easter Bunny 101.

“Well,” I started. “Well, it’s not a man in a bunny suit. That would be scary and I’d have to call 911.”

“That’s why you didn’t take us to the mall Easter Bunny. Because he was scary,” Tommy cut in.

This was true. We had passed the mall Easter Bunny and I had shuddered.

“Is he real?” Tommy had asked, pointing to the giant white bunny with giant creepy eyes. And an unflattering huge bowtie.

“Uh...no....just a man in an Easter Bunny suit. He’s friends with the Easter Bunny,” I added.

So it’s no wonder Tommy thought the Easter Bunny might be a man in a suit.

“The Easter Bunny is an actual bunny...who is...magic...” I explained. Sure. That sounded plausible, right?

Tommy seemed to accept this. “What time will he drop off our baskets?”

Er....

“Um…after you’re asleep.”

“Does he eat?”

“Excuse me?”

“Does he eat anything while he’s here? Should we leave carrots?” Tommy wondered.

“He doesn’t need to eat,” I replied. I hoped Tommy didn’t want to leave carrots. We had no carrots. We had plenty of Cadbury Crème Eggs though. Mmmm….Cadbury Crème Eggs…

“What color is he?” Tommy inquired.

“He can….change colors,” I said. Why not? I already said the bunny was magic. Wouldn’t that be cool though? I’d love to be able to change my hair magically.

“What am I going to get?” Tommy prattled on.

I checked the clock. Two hours until bedtime. Ugh.

“It’s a surprise. Now. How about we watch some Spongebob? Let’s see what shenanigans Patrick gets himself into today.”

After the kids went to bed, I put together their baskets and hid eggs around the house. I munched on a chocolate Peep as I set everything out.



And yes, the Easter Bunny left me something:



The kids checked out their stuff...



Looked for eggs...





And had candy for breakfast....

I managed to make dinner edible. It didn’t exactly go smoothly though. I’ll write more about that on Wednesday.



At least the table looked nice.

So how was your Easter?