Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Introducing....

Guess what?

I'm having another baby!

April Fools!

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Wouldn't it stink though if someone truly found out she were pregnant on April Fools Day? And then no one would believe her? And she's all, "But I AM pregnant!" and waving the positive test around her head. But then people would be all, "Hah, you just had a pregnant woman pee on that!" and she'd shriek, "NO! It's MY pee because I'm PREGNANT!!"

That would be frustrating.

However, I do have another baby.



Meet Pepto. My new laptop.

Isn't she darling?

She's just so tiny...and PINK. Much like a newborn baby. Only she doesn't wake up in the middle of the night screaming.

It was an early birthday present from Tom. He bought it early since he'll be gone on my actual birthday. He'll be tucked away in Texas with a slobbering dog biting on his arm. Because, for people who don't know, he's going to dog training school in Texas for two months. He leaves next week.

I'll miss him, of course.

But having Pepto makes his departure easier.

I've already been trying Pepto out. I like to pretend I'm a giant when I'm typing on her.

There is even a webcam on Pepto. Skype, anyone?

I also forced myself to get on the WiiFit today.

This is what I was met with:



Please.....don't.....tease....the....lady...allergic...to...working...out...

I mean, honestly!

Here I was all excited thinking that the board wasn't going to work because it was giving me an April Fools gift.

I was thinking, "You know, maybe I was wrong about the WiiFit. Maybe it really is nice."

But then I read further and realized it was the EvilFit's idea of a sick joke.

And what is UP with that cheesy hat? I couldn't stop laughing at it.

Then the EvilFit continued. Because it never just let me go to working out. No. It morphs into one of those relatives who talks and talks and talks and talks...



I actually wish it WOULD lie to me during the body test. It could tell me, oh look, you've lost three pounds. And I'd be all, "WOOHOO!"

But no. Today it told me I gained 1.1 pounds. Hmph.

And then, of course, the WiiFit got mean again:



Stop patronizing me! I have a life. I can't always get on. At least I don't go around wearing tacky hats. And at least I have a face.

Then the WiiFit asked me this:



And my answer is always the same. NO. Why does it keep asking? It's like an annoying telemarketer who continues to call and ask if you're happy with your telephone service. No matter how many times you say yes, they continue to call and ask.

Sometimes I wish that someone would kidnap my WiiFit.

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