Things That Annoy Me Thursday: Slow Walkers

See that?

That’s Natalie. Taking her time as we’re walking home from school.

We live about five minutes away from the school. To Natalie, it’s more like 5 hours. She’s always complaining that her “legs are tired.” I explain that exercise is good for her and she’s like, “I hate exercise.” I hope she never says that to Jillian Michaels. Otherwise she’s in for a long lecture about how it helps you live longer and keeps you healthier and blah blah blah.

I’m a fast walker. I cannot stand people who walk slow. I pass them. I always feel bad when I pass them and think that they’re like, “Well EXCUSE me for not moving fast enough,” to my back. My Mom was a fast walker. If I didn’t keep up, I was left behind. Well. Not really. But sort of. So I learned to sprint-walk. Tommy knows how to sprint-walk now.

Natalie….does not.

She’s a slow walker. And yes, I get that she’s five and has shorter legs. But I’ve seen her walk fast. She can DO IT if she wants to.

When we walk to school in the morning, I’m half asleep and not in the mood for her nonsense. I’m usually pretty far ahead of her and she meanders along behind me. Lalalala. Then she’ll stop and pick flowers. (Not garden flowers, just the tiny ones that grow everywhere.) If she sees a bug, she has to inspect it. She’ll decide to “take a rest” all of a sudden and I won’t even know until I’m way up ahead. Then I turn around and find her stretched out on the sidewalk.

This is why she probably won’t be able to walk to school by herself for awhile. She’d probably always be late! I think it’s cool that she wants to inspect and learn about the world she lives in—but why does it have to be at 8 in the morning?

Like I said, after school is no better. Sometimes I scoop her up and carry her until my arm feels like it’s going to break off—which is usually about a minute after picking her up. I shouldn’t pick her up, I know, but I also get that she’s been at school all day and probably IS tired. Plus, when I pick her up I think, “I can work out my arms!”

Could I drive? Yes. But honestly, I could use the exercise. I eat a lot of junk. Plus, it seems silly to drive when our destination is FIVE MINUTES AWAY.

I guess I’ll have to put up with my slow walker daughter. Maybe in time she’ll become a sprint-walker.

Or maybe she’ll continue to take a rest on the sidewalks.

Who knows?