Thursday, January 7, 2010

People Who Annoy Me

My patience has been thin today and it didn’t help when my darling daughter rudely stole (and ATE) my last Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. Then she had the audacity to call me a poo head and I’m sorry, if anyone is a poo head around here it’s her because she should know not to eat another woman’s chocolate. Anyhow, I decided to make a list of people who annoy me. And mind you, these are just for fun, not meant to offend.

People Who Annoy Me Are....


People who start lawsuits claiming that fast food made them fat. Hello? Don’t buy the fast food then!

Children who steal their mother’s last Reeses Peanut Butter cups.

People with music on their blogs. I think it’s great that you think Miley Cyrus rocks. But I don’t. Plus, the music winds up frightening me because my husband leaves the sound blasting and I’m not aware until I go to a blog with music and nearly pass out from fright.

People that ride my car’s ass when I’m going the speed limit. You know how people have a personal bubble around them? So do cars. Back off.

Kate Gosselin. And her gross looks-like-a-fool-with-those-diamond-earrings ex-husband.

Men who wear diamond earrings.

People on eBay who bid on something and then don’t pay for it.

Husbands who don’t pick up after themselves.

People who constantly go, “You know what I’m sayin’?” No, I don’t know what you’re saying, actually. Could you tell me what you are saying so you don’t have to keep having to say “You know what I’m sayin’?”

Pretty much everyone who goes on The Maury Show. (Laquinta, you might want to stop sleeping with Darnoosh because he’s currently cheating on you with your best friend Lou. Sorry.)

People who bring their dogs everywhere with them. Hi, I’m here to see you, not Fluffy your creepy dog who actually wears clothes.

People who treat Oprah like she’s some kind of God.

People who don’t get sarcasm. I know Dr. Phil says it’s the lowest form of humor but I find the lowest form of humor hilarious.

Farrah, a teenager on this show called Teen Moms. She had the audacity to yell at her Mom, “Just let me be a real teen!” Newsflash Farrah. You had a baby at sixteen. You don’t get to be a real teen anymore. Sorry.

Uppity mothers who probably were the ones who made Nick JR have to post things like this before each of their shows:



Look, all Nick JR has to tell me is this. “Show will keep child out of your hair. Show will allow you to use the bathroom in peace. Show will give you silence for at least ten minutes.”

That’s all I care about.

I don't care about kinesthetic skills for craps sake!

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