Wednesday, May 7, 2008

On Being a Worthy Woman

I got an email this week from a woman friend of mine. It was very touching and made me think about all the things we as women do .....don't do....and bear the load for. I had to share it with those of you out there who read my blog. It is called:

One Flaw In Women
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what
makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.
Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
I just had to share this with all the women out there I know and don't know. This was written with me in mind....and I know it probably fits many of you. If I had to choose a major flaw and broadcast it....weight not included....it would be that many times I have lost sight of my worth. Many of us...men included are products of a strong willed parent. I had one of those. My mother is very strong willed and it resulted in me not having any self-esteem at all. I have been singing since I was three....my mom could have been a stage mom for a beauty queen. All my life...I have had to sing on demand. Even today at 54, when my mom says....sing....I open my mouth and out comes a song. It is very frustrating to be treated in that way. My father....now that was a different story....he has always been supportive, loving, kind, and when I was crying....he made me feel as if I was somebody. I never felt like somebody with my mom.....she was somebody....I was her shadow....or puppet....kind of like Waylon and Madame. I was the dummy doll. Oh, my mom loved me....she was just such a strong personality....that I got lost in the shadow of her. My dating life....was not much better....I tended to gravitate to people who were strong personalities...I was the wall flower of most groups....unless music was involved. Then and only then would I shine. I married young....I was 20....and my husband had a very strong personality....and a daughter with one too....Once again....I drifted into the woodwork. It was not until I had my daughter....that the fighter in me began to emerge. I realized....I was somebody....not just Ronnie's wife...and Jeni's mom....I was me....I was screaming to get out....so I went to college...finished....got a Master's Degree.....I had arrived. When my daughter graduated from high school....I went one more step to freedom....I left my husband...and became single. Becoming single....was really just a justification....I had been a single mom a long time....just a married one. Sounds pecular huh? Well....I was a single mom....My life centered around the kids....his life centered around him. At the age of 44 I walked out on 22 years of marriage. I thought I was ready for it....but the first few months....I spent most of my time away from work....in a fetal position crying myself to sleep. I was terrified. I wanted him to miss me....I wanted him to want me back....and it did not happen that way....I drew the line....he did not step across it.....so I had to find out if I truly could do it on my own....the day I signed my divorce papers....I got in my car....with no shoes on....no purse....and found myself out of gas...outside of Tuscaloosa....a very kind employee at a truck stop....fed me, put a tank of gas in my car, and listened to me cry.....and when I tried to send money back....told me....just do something nice for someone else....pay it forward. I have never forgotten that day...I realized that day....I was somebody....worth being friends with....worth being the child of....worth being noted. That was in 2000. In 2002 I attended an Emmaus Walk....I found myself....with the help of a wonderful table of ladies that God put there just for me. He showed me how wonderful life can be....he does not make junk and I am His creation....so I am not junk! I am first run.....I am the best there is. Now, here I am in 2008. The group I sang with opened last weekend for Cowboy Crush....they said we were really good...I have a great husband....who is proud of me....encourages me....supports me....loves me inspite of myself.....I AM SOMEBODY OF WORTH. I AMA CHILD OF GOD! That makes me royalty! PTL!

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