Friday, February 3, 2012

My Dear Letters

Happy Friday!

I decided to do My Dear letters that I wish I could send. Have a fabulous weekend.



Dear JC Penney Commercials,

I get that the store is trying something new. But a commercial where everyone screams “nooooo” is not going to get me interested. It’s going to make me want to change the channel.

Signed,
An-I-hear-enough-screaming-at-home,
Amber

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Dear Janelle from Teen Mom 2,

Sweetie, drop Kieffer. He’s an ass and probably smells like feet. Plus, who wants to date someone with the name Kieffer? Spend more time with your kid so he doesn’t grow up resenting you. It is not your mother’s responsibility. Stop yelling at everyone, stop smoking weed, and get your act together.

Signed,
A-No-One-Feels-Sorry-For-You,
Amber


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Dear SuperBowl,

I can't wait until you are over. I am tired of hearing about you and probably won't even watch. Not even for the commercials. I'll hear about them on Monday and The Today Show will highlight the best ones anyway.

Signed,
I'll-Just-Watch-DVRed-Stuff-Then,
Amber


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Dear Natalie,

Actually, it’s called GROUNDHOG day. Not Beaver day. But thank you for making me laugh.

Signed,
An-I-know-I’m-Immature,
Amber

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Dear Mother On Toddlers and Tiaras who doesn’t understand why she’s being blasted for dressing her three-year-old like Julia Robert’s character in Pretty Woman,

Um. Because she was a HOOKER. You can try to explain it however you want but the bottom line is, poor choice.

Signed,
A-Next-Time-Dress-Your-Kid-Less-Tart-ish,
Amber

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Dear Tommy,

It’s a little strange that you want sideburns just because Spencer from iCarly had them. But okay. If that’s what you want. ???

Signed,
A-My-Kid-Goes-Through-Odd-Phases,
Amber

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